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POSITIVITY AND INSPIRATION FOR ANYONE AND EVERYONE

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“Courage is fear that has said it’s prayers.” Fear is an emotion that all humans are hard-wired to experience.  In the cave-man days, fear saved our ancestors’ lives.  Today, we face different dangers and fears than our ancestors did, but the experience of fear is the same.  It’s uncomfortable and it’s designed to elicit a self-protective response.  Threat. Fear. Response. Bear. Fear. RUN.  Disagree with the crowd.  Fear rejection.  Suppress the authentic self by “agreeing”. The fears that we experience as most threatening vary from person to person.  Some fear rejection more than anything else.  For others, it’s abandonment, loneliness, failure, inadequacy or embarrassment (just to name a few).  What it is that we fear most as individuals does not matter.  What matters is that we understand two things: 1.) No one is fearless.  EVERYONE experiences fear and we need not be ashamed of feeling fearful. 2.) Fear makes bravery possible.  We cannot be brave or courageous if we are not fearful in the first place. In both our personal and professional lives, we are faced with difficult decisions on a daily basis.  The right decision is often obvious, but the pressure to make the wrong decision can be overwhelming.  It’s overwhelming because fear gets in the way.  It could be fear of upsetting someone you care about, fear of losing something or someone, fear of being rejected by peers, etc.  Whatever the fear, it often takes great courage to make the right decision. If you think you’re fearless, you’re wrong.  In a society that values bravery and equates fear with weakness, we often try to “get rid of” our fear as soon as we feel it.This doesn’t mean it isn’t there!  If you judge yourself for experiencing fear and try to convince yourself out of it, you’re doing yourself a disservice.  Instead of suppressing  fearful emotions, acknowledge them and convert them into something productive … like courage! Don’t judge yourself for being fearful.  Fear is a completely natural and unavoidable emotion.  Whether we admit it or not, we all experience fear.  It is what we do with that fear that matters.  Courageousness and bravery are qualities that we value, but in order to be courageous or brave, we have to first recognize our fears, buckle down, and proceed through them.  Not around them.  Not over, or under them.  THROUGH them.  That is what true courage consists of.  If you find yourself derailed by fear, remember: “Courage is fear that has said it’s prayers.”  Try to find comfort in the idea that everyone experiences fear, and we all have the power to convert this fear into courage by adding a bit of hope and faith in ourselves or others into the equation. You can be brave, you can be courageous, and you can be strong.

“Courage is fear that has said it’s prayers.”

Fear is an emotion that all humans are hard-wired to experience.  In the cave-man days, fear saved our ancestors’ lives.  Today, we face different dangers and fears than our ancestors did, but the experience of fear is the same.  It’s uncomfortable and it’s designed to elicit a self-protective response. 

Threat. Fear. Response.

Bear. Fear. RUN. 

Disagree with the crowd.  Fear rejection.  Suppress the authentic self by “agreeing”.

The fears that we experience as most threatening vary from person to person.  Some fear rejection more than anything else.  For others, it’s abandonment, loneliness, failure, inadequacy or embarrassment (just to name a few).  What it is that we fear most as individuals does not matter.  What matters is that we understand two things: 1.) No one is fearless.  EVERYONE experiences fear and we need not be ashamed of feeling fearful. 2.) Fear makes bravery possible.  We cannot be brave or courageous if we are not fearful in the first place.

In both our personal and professional lives, we are faced with difficult decisions on a daily basis.  The right decision is often obvious, but the pressure to make the wrong decision can be overwhelming.  It’s overwhelming because fear gets in the way.  It could be fear of upsetting someone you care about, fear of losing something or someone, fear of being rejected by peers, etc.  Whatever the fear, it often takes great courage to make the right decision.

If you think you’re fearless, you’re wrong.  In a society that values bravery and equates fear with weakness, we often try to “get rid of” our fear as soon as we feel it.This doesn’t mean it isn’t there!  If you judge yourself for experiencing fear and try to convince yourself out of it, you’re doing yourself a disservice.  Instead of suppressing  fearful emotions, acknowledge them and convert them into something productive … like courage!

Don’t judge yourself for being fearful.  Fear is a completely natural and unavoidable emotion.  Whether we admit it or not, we all experience fear.  It is what we do with that fear that matters.  Courageousness and bravery are qualities that we value, but in order to be courageous or brave, we have to first recognize our fears, buckle down, and proceed through them.  Not around them.  Not over, or under them.  THROUGH them.  That is what true courage consists of. 

If you find yourself derailed by fear, remember: “Courage is fear that has said it’s prayers.”  Try to find comfort in the idea that everyone experiences fear, and we all have the power to convert this fear into courage by adding a bit of hope and faith in ourselves or others into the equation.

You can be brave, you can be courageous, and you can be strong.

Filed under courage fear quote art recovery ed substance abuse anorexia bulimia self harm self help inspiration love support mental health psychology eating disorder depression anxiety

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Tear’s don’t mean you’re losing. We are taught that crying is a sign of weakness.  Crying in response to real emotions is a sign that we are human. Crying to manipulate a person or situation: Neither cool nor justified. Crying in response to real emotions: Excellent. Crying is simply a sign that we are human beings that have emotions.  We cry when we are happy, sad, frightened, worried, stressed, excited … it is a physical manifestation of emotions; that’s all.  We don’t need to fear it or give it any sort of significance it doesn’t deserve.  It’s OK to cry.  Of course, there are times and places where it is/is or in our best interest to let the tears flow.  There are times and places where it’s appropriate to cry and times and places where we need to hold it together.  When, where, and who it is appropriate to cry with is up to us to decide for ourselves as individuals.  What’s right for one person may not be right for the next. Ruminating or getting stuck in sadness or fear won’t get anyone anywhere, but neither will ignoring such feelings completely.  Many people, including myself, believe that with every experience comes a lesson.  We can only learn from our experiences if we acknowledge and feel ALL of the emotions that are attached to them.  If something frustrates you but you refuse to acknowledge that frustration or try to convince yourself out of it, you cannot recognize that something is happening that you want to change in the first place, let alone make a change that will help you feel better!  This principle applies to many emotions.  If we’re sad but we don’t acknowledge that sadness, we cannot adequately identify what it is about our current circumstances that is causing us to feel sad and therefore cannot do anything about it!  Repressing feelings or convincing ourselves we do not feel a certain way does not serve us! Today, crying takes courage.  The ability to cry requires us to be vulnerable and vulnerability can be a scary thing in an individualistic society that values strength as much as ours does.  Crying also requires us to be in touch with our true feelings, which can be a frightening experience as well.  For example, if you grew up learning that not only is crying a sign of weakness, but sadness and fear are as well, you probably learned to repress those feelings almost automatically when you have them.  To acknowledge and own them as your true feelings at any given time is hard! Bottom line: Tear’s don’t mean you’re losing. In fact, tears often mean you are winning.

Tear’s don’t mean you’re losing.

We are taught that crying is a sign of weakness.  Crying in response to real emotions is a sign that we are human.

Crying to manipulate a person or situation: Neither cool nor justified.

Crying in response to real emotions: Excellent.

Crying is simply a sign that we are human beings that have emotions.  We cry when we are happy, sad, frightened, worried, stressed, excited … it is a physical manifestation of emotions; that’s all.  We don’t need to fear it or give it any sort of significance it doesn’t deserve.  It’s OK to cry.  Of course, there are times and places where it is/is or in our best interest to let the tears flow.  There are times and places where it’s appropriate to cry and times and places where we need to hold it together.  When, where, and who it is appropriate to cry with is up to us to decide for ourselves as individuals.  What’s right for one person may not be right for the next.

Ruminating or getting stuck in sadness or fear won’t get anyone anywhere, but neither will ignoring such feelings completely.  Many people, including myself, believe that with every experience comes a lesson.  We can only learn from our experiences if we acknowledge and feel ALL of the emotions that are attached to them.  If something frustrates you but you refuse to acknowledge that frustration or try to convince yourself out of it, you cannot recognize that something is happening that you want to change in the first place, let alone make a change that will help you feel better!  This principle applies to many emotions.  If we’re sad but we don’t acknowledge that sadness, we cannot adequately identify what it is about our current circumstances that is causing us to feel sad and therefore cannot do anything about it!  Repressing feelings or convincing ourselves we do not feel a certain way does not serve us!

Today, crying takes courage.  The ability to cry requires us to be vulnerable and vulnerability can be a scary thing in an individualistic society that values strength as much as ours does.  Crying also requires us to be in touch with our true feelings, which can be a frightening experience as well.  For example, if you grew up learning that not only is crying a sign of weakness, but sadness and fear are as well, you probably learned to repress those feelings almost automatically when you have them.  To acknowledge and own them as your true feelings at any given time is hard!

Bottom line: Tear’s don’t mean you’re losing.

In fact, tears often mean you are winning.

(via insight-inspiration)

Filed under art cry emotions inspiration mental health positive psychology ptsd quote recovery self help substance abuse tears ed eating disorder bulimia anorexia

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Do you have a problem that is stressing you out or causing anxiety and discomfort?  What if you could reduce this discomfort and anxiety by entertaining the idea of looking at your problem as an opportunity??   If your alarm bells have already started sounding at the mere thought of this “problem” and you find yourself saying something to the effect of ” NO I haven’t, because _______ IS a PROBLEM,” try stopping for a minute to think.  The reaction I just described is a feeling based reaction, not a thought based reaction.  Yes, it’s a thought itself but this particular thought is based more on feelings of worry, fear and frustration than facts.  These emotionally based thoughts often fuel worries and anxieties keep us stuck in the cycle of: Problem presented —> experience a feeling (fear, worry, etc.) —> increased anxiety (not a feeling, but the body’s response to feelings that precede it) —> emotionally based reaction —> more anxiety —> bigger feelings —> bigger emotionally based reaction to compensate —> EVEN more anxiety ……… you get the picture. If you’re looking for a quick and/or permanent fix, you can stop reading now. I hate to break it to you, but those don’t exist.  If you are interested in first acknowledging the difficulty of your current situation (which is a vital step in this process), as well as exploring some new ways to think about things that might help you feel better and problem solve more effectively, continue on! When a problematic situation comes to mind and the uncomfortable feelings start flooding in, try stopping for a minute to really think about what opportunities you already have and what opportunities could potentially come from your current set of circumstances.  Please, don’t mistake me here; thinking in this way won’t make the problem go away, but it will help build strength and resilience when the going gets rough.  It will also help create adequate space to have the mental clarity to use problem solving skills effectively.   Good things are out there and they will come, as long as we’re open to noticing and receiving them.  If we’re constantly viewing challenges as problems, we’re not actively seeking or even leaving any room for opportunities!  I’m not saying it works like magic.  It doesn’t.  We are often quick to blame one’s thinking habits for their down mood or less than chipper attitude.  Our thoughts are a large contributor to how we feel, but how we experience out feelings is really much more complex than simply changing a thought.  We all face problems and challenges of different shapes and sizes but we can help create space for ourselves to problem solve more effectively by viewing problems as opportunities for meaningful change to occur.   If worrying is getting in the way of life today (or any day for that matter), ask; in what ways can I view this problem as an opportunity? If you’re really dedicated to answering that question, you are bound to come up with at least a few.  Recognizing these opportunities will decrease your level of anxiety and boost your mood, at least a little bit!

Do you have a problem that is stressing you out or causing anxiety and discomfort?  What if you could reduce this discomfort and anxiety by entertaining the idea of looking at your problem as an opportunity??  

If your alarm bells have already started sounding at the mere thought of this “problem” and you find yourself saying something to the effect of ” NO I haven’t, because _______ IS a PROBLEM,” try stopping for a minute to think.  The reaction I just described is a feeling based reaction, not a thought based reaction.  Yes, it’s a thought itself but this particular thought is based more on feelings of worry, fear and frustration than facts.  These emotionally based thoughts often fuel worries and anxieties keep us stuck in the cycle of:

Problem presented —> experience a feeling (fear, worry, etc.) —> increased anxiety (not a feeling, but the body’s response to feelings that precede it) —> emotionally based reaction —> more anxiety —> bigger feelings —> bigger emotionally based reaction to compensate —> EVEN more anxiety ……… you get the picture.

If you’re looking for a quick and/or permanent fix, you can stop reading now. I hate to break it to you, but those don’t exist.  If you are interested in first acknowledging the difficulty of your current situation (which is a vital step in this process), as well as exploring some new ways to think about things that might help you feel better and problem solve more effectively, continue on!

When a problematic situation comes to mind and the uncomfortable feelings start flooding in, try stopping for a minute to really think about what opportunities you already have and what opportunities could potentially come from your current set of circumstances.  Please, don’t mistake me here; thinking in this way won’t make the problem go away, but it will help build strength and resilience when the going gets rough.  It will also help create adequate space to have the mental clarity to use problem solving skills effectively.  

Good things are out there and they will come, as long as we’re open to noticing and receiving them.  If we’re constantly viewing challenges as problems, we’re not actively seeking or even leaving any room for opportunities!  I’m not saying it works like magic.  It doesn’t.  We are often quick to blame one’s thinking habits for their down mood or less than chipper attitude.  Our thoughts are a large contributor to how we feel, but how we experience out feelings is really much more complex than simply changing a thought.  We all face problems and challenges of different shapes and sizes but we can help create space for ourselves to problem solve more effectively by viewing problems as opportunities for meaningful change to occur.  

If worrying is getting in the way of life today (or any day for that matter), ask; in what ways can I view this problem as an opportunity? If you’re really dedicated to answering that question, you are bound to come up with at least a few.  Recognizing these opportunities will decrease your level of anxiety and boost your mood, at least a little bit!

Filed under anxiety mental health problem opportunity picture quote inspiration positivity psychology self-help

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The future started yesterday. New Rule: Nothing “starts tomorrow.”  Today day is about half over … what are you going to do to make this day even better?  No matter what has already happened today, you have the ability to make it better.  If it’s going well … keep going.  If you’re feeling down, don’t chalk it up as a loss just yet.  Don’t wait until tomorrow to turn things around.  Seize the moment … this moment!  Do. It. Now. Don’t wait until tomorrow.  Start TODAY.  Why?  Because you’re worth it and you CAN.

The future started yesterday.

New Rule: Nothing “starts tomorrow.”  Today day is about half over … what are you going to do to make this day even better?  No matter what has already happened today, you have the ability to make it better.  If it’s going well … keep going.  If you’re feeling down, don’t chalk it up as a loss just yet.  Don’t wait until tomorrow to turn things around.  Seize the moment … this moment!  Do. It. Now.

Don’t wait until tomorrow.  Start TODAY.  Why?  Because you’re worth it and you CAN.

Filed under inspiration support anxiety depression ed eating disorder substance abuse alcohol ptsd psychology quote art love

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There are no “mistakes”, only lessons learned.  Don’t beat yourself up over things you would do differently in hind-sight.  Remember, hindsight is 20-20 … and that’s a great thing!  Things can be disappointing, sad, frustrating, even enraging … but just for today, try to be kind to yourself.  Sometimes, we even have to make the same mistake over and over again to truly build the awareness necessary to finally do things a little differently.  Guess what?  That is OK!  It’s OK and it’s NORMAL! Be patient with yourself.  “Mistakes” are lessons learned and the knowledge gained from each life experience we have can help us make the changes we strive for. 

There are no “mistakes”, only lessons learned.  Don’t beat yourself up over things you would do differently in hind-sight.  Remember, hindsight is 20-20 … and that’s a great thing!  Things can be disappointing, sad, frustrating, even enraging … but just for today, try to be kind to yourself.  Sometimes, we even have to make the same mistake over and over again to truly build the awareness necessary to finally do things a little differently.  Guess what?  That is OK!  It’s OK and it’s NORMAL! Be patient with yourself.  “Mistakes” are lessons learned and the knowledge gained from each life experience we have can help us make the changes we strive for. 

(Source: the-healing-nest, via youve-always-mattered)

Filed under inspiration recovery support quote art lesson mistake

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If you find yourself getting overwhelmed or stuck in the past or future (guilty as charged here), bring yourself back by appreciating where you are right now.  Right now you’re safe.  Right now you’re OK.  Right now you’re loved and protected. It’s easy to get stuck in the past or future, but LIFE EXISTS RIGHT, HERE RIGHT NOW. Nowhere else. There are good things all around us.  There are also sad, scary, enraging and anxiety provoking things around us too.  Yuck.  We get stuck in the past and future to avoid the anxiety that feelings we experience in the present stir up. There’s pressure in the present.  There are unknowns in the present.  There are fears in the present.  There’s insecurity in the present.  I’m sure we could go on for days, BUT there are so many wonderful, beautiful, pleasant things in the present as well and we’re missing out on them by traveling to the past or future. We are programmed to want to avoid or get rid of discomfort.  Anxiety associated with the present is uncomfortable, so we bail.  SEE YA!  We do this by traveling to the past or future.  We already know what happened in the past.  Even if our minds take us to an unpleasant place, it’s still familiar.  There’s comfort in the familiar, even if it’s not pleasant.   There are no unknowns in the past.  The future is comforting because you can fantasize that it will turn out however you wish OR if you’re the anxious type you can plan for the next catastrophe.  There’s comfort in both places, but it’s not possible to take in all of the wonderful things happening in the here and now if we’re not “here”. Go figure! Have confidence.  Know that you can handle whatever this moment brings.  If we are in a constant pattern of not staying mindfully present, there is often an underlying, subconscious sense that we cannot handle what we are experiencing in this moment.  Have confidence.  Know that you can handle whatever this moment brings.  That will help you stay in the moment and take in all of the goodness floating around the universe. There are good things all around you. Soak them up.  You deserve good things and they are there for you if you are open, aware, present, receptive, and appreciative :)

If you find yourself getting overwhelmed or stuck in the past or future (guilty as charged here), bring yourself back by appreciating where you are right now.  Right now you’re safe.  Right now you’re OK.  Right now you’re loved and protected. It’s easy to get stuck in the past or future, but LIFE EXISTS RIGHT, HERE RIGHT NOW. Nowhere else.


There are good things all around us.  There are also sad, scary, enraging and anxiety provoking things around us too.  Yuck.  We get stuck in the past and future to avoid the anxiety that feelings we experience in the present stir up. There’s pressure in the present.  There are unknowns in the present.  There are fears in the present.  There’s insecurity in the present.  I’m sure we could go on for days, BUT there are so many wonderful, beautiful, pleasant things in the present as well and we’re missing out on them by traveling to the past or future.


We are programmed to want to avoid or get rid of discomfort.  Anxiety associated with the present is uncomfortable, so we bail.  SEE YA!  We do this by traveling to the past or future.  We already know what happened in the past.  Even if our minds take us to an unpleasant place, it’s still familiar.  There’s comfort in the familiar, even if it’s not pleasant.   There are no unknowns in the past.  The future is comforting because you can fantasize that it will turn out however you wish OR if you’re the anxious type you can plan for the next catastrophe.  There’s comfort in both places, but it’s not possible to take in all of the wonderful things happening in the here and now if we’re not “here”. Go figure!


Have confidence.  Know that you can handle whatever this moment brings.  If we are in a constant pattern of not staying mindfully present, there is often an underlying, subconscious sense that we cannot handle what we are experiencing in this moment.  Have confidence.  Know that you can handle whatever this moment brings.  That will help you stay in the moment and take in all of the goodness floating around the universe.


There are good things all around you. Soak them up.  You deserve good things and they are there for you if you are open, aware, present, receptive, and appreciative :)

Filed under inspiration mindful present courage anxiety depression recovery quote positive support

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Today is about the small things.  Small things add up to make BIG differences.  Cliche?  Yes.  False? Nope! When you’re walking down the street, smile.  Most people will probably be too busy inside their own heads to notice, but one smile at one person may make their entire day! Slow down long enough to hold the door for the person behind you.  Help a coworker.  Give someone you know a hug when you say hello. You have no idea how much of an impact something small like that can have on someone.  Maybe it will.  Maybe it won’t.  What’s there to lose though?  Probably not much. Doing small things with great love will also make you feel good too!

Today is about the small things.  Small things add up to make BIG differences.  Cliche?  Yes.  False? Nope!

When you’re walking down the street, smile.  Most people will probably be too busy inside their own heads to notice, but one smile at one person may make their entire day! Slow down long enough to hold the door for the person behind you.  Help a coworker.  Give someone you know a hug when you say hello. You have no idea how much of an impact something small like that can have on someone.  Maybe it will.  Maybe it won’t.  What’s there to lose though?  Probably not much. Doing small things with great love will also make you feel good too!

(via recoveryisbeautiful)

Filed under love quote inspiration support happy smile hug positive positivity recovery

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Strength comes in many forms. Strength is endurance.  Endurance is losing the little battles to win the big one in the end.  If you want to move a boat at the edge of a dock, would you run into it with a big smash?  Probably not.  I hope not.  You’ll end up hurting yourself!  Instead, you’d probably stand at the edge of the dock and lean into the boat with force, but with grace.  STRENGTH KEEPS LEANING. MOST of the time, it doesn’t do us any good to charge at the boat full force.  We’ll end up falling, which isn’t always a bad thing but there are times when we are better off putting forth steady force and steady efforts to reach our goals.  If you slip, that’s OK.  In fact, I hate to break it to you but IT’S GOING TO HAPPEN.  That’s OK, as long as you get back up.  Think about some of your strengths.  Don’t try to say you have none.  Nice try, but I’m not buying it ;) Then, think about some of the good things you use those strengths for.  Earning a living?  Doing well in school?  Making people smile? Tell yourself: I am strong. It’s good for me to be strong.  My strength helps good things happen.  Good people want me to be strong.  Anyone who wants you to be weak goes into the fondly named category I like to call “haters” and unfortunately there is no space for haters in our lives. To increase your sense of strength, recall times when you’ve felt strong.  Close your eyes and remember what your body felt like.  What your mind felt like.  What your spirit felt like.  Most importantly; notice how good it feels to be strong.  Appreciate the many ways in which your strength has and continues to empower you to do great things, both for yourself and for others.  Tell yourself that you are strong.  Tell yourself you can endure, persist, cope and prevail.  You are strong enough to hold your entire experience of the world, both positive and negative in awareness without being overwhelmed. Say it:  I am strong enough to hold my entire experience in awareness with out being overwhelmed.  The winds of life can blow hard, but I am a deeply rooted tree.  Winds only make me stronger. You are strong.  You are brave.  You are powerful.  Now go put that strength, bravery and power to good use!

Strength comes in many forms. Strength is endurance.  Endurance is losing the little battles to win the big one in the end. 

If you want to move a boat at the edge of a dock, would you run into it with a big smash?  Probably not.  I hope not.  You’ll end up hurting yourself!  Instead, you’d probably stand at the edge of the dock and lean into the boat with force, but with grace.  STRENGTH KEEPS LEANING.

MOST of the time, it doesn’t do us any good to charge at the boat full force.  We’ll end up falling, which isn’t always a bad thing but there are times when we are better off putting forth steady force and steady efforts to reach our goals.  If you slip, that’s OK.  In fact, I hate to break it to you but IT’S GOING TO HAPPEN.  That’s OK, as long as you get back up. 

Think about some of your strengths.  Don’t try to say you have none.  Nice try, but I’m not buying it ;) Then, think about some of the good things you use those strengths for.  Earning a living?  Doing well in school?  Making people smile?

Tell yourself: I am strong. It’s good for me to be strong.  My strength helps good things happen.  Good people want me to be strong.  Anyone who wants you to be weak goes into the fondly named category I like to call “haters” and unfortunately there is no space for haters in our lives.

To increase your sense of strength, recall times when you’ve felt strong.  Close your eyes and remember what your body felt like.  What your mind felt like.  What your spirit felt like.  Most importantly; notice how good it feels to be strong.  Appreciate the many ways in which your strength has and continues to empower you to do great things, both for yourself and for others. 

Tell yourself that you are strong.  Tell yourself you can endure, persist, cope and prevail.  You are strong enough to hold your entire experience of the world, both positive and negative in awareness without being overwhelmed. Say it:  I am strong enough to hold my entire experience in awareness with out being overwhelmed.  The winds of life can blow hard, but I am a deeply rooted tree.  Winds only make me stronger.

You are strong.  You are brave.  You are powerful.  Now go put that strength, bravery and power to good use!

(Source: live-a-life-of-liberty)

Filed under strong strength quote brave power powerful recovery ed anorexia bulimia self-harm empower advice help support substance abuse ptsd abuse